0121: Wake me up when January ends

Some days, I'm intimately aware of the stress of this month. If we live through the next two weeks, we're going to be fine, but... we gotta get through this bit.

I'm taking two classes, which are related in one way but are completely different in every other. It's breaking me a bit.

One class is FLE (Français Langue Étrangère), because I'm in France and if I want to get citizenship, they expect me to know the language. I'm doing fine, but the exam is a week from today, and so I'm stressing a lot about it. I never finished high school; this kind of formalized learning is very much outside of my comfort level.

The other is the same, and yet the exact opposite: a TEFL (Teaching English as a Foreign Language) course. I know English as well as I'm ever going to at this point, but learning how to teach it to others is, god, a whole nother planet.

Building lesson plans and having them judged by foreign faceless (but clearly quite human, thankfully) judges is hard enough, but I'm still the same guy who has severe inattentive ADHD and Depression, and a five-year-old, and so being able to focus on this stuff for more than a few minutes at a time is a frigging chore.

My wife (who is an English professor, and whose French is better than mine) is on book deadline for the end of this month, so we're all a little tense right now.

All I wanna do is make movies and go on my little runs around Paris and maybe wind up a little footnote in someone else's Wikipedia page. Is that so wrong?